Posted On 27 Jun 2018
In this interview the author helps us understand more about feminine awakening and how Tantric practices can help women to rediscover their feminine essence and experience sexual freedom.
How did you come to guiding women into their feminine awakening and sexual freedom?
I grew up in Germany and came to the US in my late twenties to do post-graduate work in music. Eventually I became a management consultant and found myself quite successful at that yet miserable at intimate relationships. I was longing for lasting, intimate, fulfilling love, but kept being attracted to unavailable men.
In my despair over the possibility that lasting love may just not be part of my journey on this planet, I decided one day to no longer tolerate the status quo. And this led me to put myself on a path of studying meditation and then Tantra. I knew that there was something in the way and without new input the trajectory of my intimate life was going to be clear.
In the process of my tantric healing work I discovered that I had held distrust towards men. I tapped into an experience that happened when I was 18 years old. First boyfriend. First love. First intercourse. The latter was incredibly painful. I had to go to the gynecologist and the bill went to my parents’ house. My dad opened it and became enraged. I felt so lost, so alone and I emotionally withdrew.
And at that time I made a decision something like ‘men are never there for you when you really need them.’ No wonder I was going after unavailable men, who proved my decision right.
When I was able to re-experience that emotional and physical pain of the 18 year-old and let it go, I found deeper trust in myself and then deeper trust in men. And then six months later my beloved – my life and business partner – came into my life.
I left the consulting firm shortly after this new opening and dedicated my life to sharing this healing opportunity with women all over the world.
When you talk about feminine essence, how is that connected to living a fulfilled life in love and career?
There is a core essence in all of us which knows exactly how to get everything we want in life. However, it gets cluttered at some point due to trauma, such as with me when I was 18 years old.
When we experience this kind of early trauma we try to cope with it by shutting down our feelings that are too painful. We then hold this pattern in our body and continue to play it out (unconsciously) through our lives. This is what we call a “block.” Unless we clear that block we cannot reach a sense of full sexual and emotional freedom.
And to experience this freedom has to do with living our life from our feminine essence that emanates from our sexual center. In the ancient language of Sanskrit, a woman’s sexual center is called “Yoni” which means Sacred Space. Now, imagine how it would have felt to have been introduced to your vagina as a Sacred Space as a teenager. How different would your trajectory have been in terms of your intimate sexual love self?
Once we tap into our essence, we can start to use this energy to clear blocks, which in turn allows us to come back to wholeness. It’s available to every woman who would like to reawaken that feminine essence within her and express it the way she wants: through self-love, through sharing with a partner, or through channeling it into her creative pursuits.
She can learn to use her sexual creative energy beyond the bedroom towards pursuits such as writing a book, creating a summit for women, starting or growing a business. It’s the same energy. And that’s what is available to us when we learn Tantric practices.
What are some ways that a woman might start to cultivate the connection to her feminine essence and sexual freedom?
Practice is key and I would suggest beginning with this short exercise:
Find a comfortable seat, place one hand on your belly around the navel and take a deep breath in through the nose, down into your lungs, and extend the belly into the hand. On the exhalation, follow the breath back up and out through your lungs and nostrils. Repeat this breathing pattern a few more times.
When you breathe in the next time, imagine the breath coming in through your nostrils, going down through your torso, all the way down into your belly, into your Yoni center. On the exhalation, send the breath back up and out. Continue breathing in your own rhythm and just take a moment and notice how you’re feeling.
The key is to use the breath to tap into your Yoni, your feminine essence, as in the above practice. It’s a knowingness that lives in our bodies and is waiting to be rediscovered, reawakened, and reconnected with. That is where aliveness arises, where joyful living starts to emanate. And who wouldn’t want that?